I just turned on the TV and 'Crufts 2003' is on. Why do fat people with weird facial hair (including the women) feel the need to put on a 1970's geography teachers suit and run around a spotlit arena with the over pruned 'dogs' (some look like nothing on this gods earth) - and more to the point why does the BBC spend some of the the licence fee on televising it?

Oh my god now one of the judges is feeling a dog tackle! I feel queesy...