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> Kill Paul Newbery!
michael
post Dec 23 2006, 08:00 PM
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The success of Gears of War needs no explanation. Graphically polished and tweaked to deliver the ultimate Xbox Live experience, Cliffy B and the boys at Epic Games deserve all the praises heaped upon them. Tipping the mighty Halo2 off the spot as the mose popular online Xbox game, the adventures of Mr Fenix and co. have brought many Ringers together, both new and not so new. This era of new found gaming pleasure and unity will end on Christmas Day when Mr. Newbery opens his copy.
Those too young to remember must take warning. I have borne witness to the destructive power of RP Wingnut across too many battlefields, race tracks and hostage standoffs to recount. His ability to assimilate himself into any game in a matter of minutes will only result in your immediate, humiliating demise. He can out-snipe, out-run and out-gun anyone her wishes with effortless impunity. Wingnut + Gears of War = Death for You and Me. It's that simple.
This time, I have a plan. I'm not paying Microsoft £40 a year just so I can watch Paul clean up every map from the comfort of my dead-man's spectator-view. I spent far too much time doing that on Counterstrike. No, this time I want to raise an army. An army with the balls to stand up to RP Wingnut and be counted. An army, trained on every map, skilled in every weapon and aware of every camping spot to give us the advantage that we so desparately need. Tactical estimates gives us just 36 hours before The Real Emergence Day, taking dinner and the Queen's Speech into consideration. Sign up now! Get in the Fight!


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