The US is pretty upset with the French for disagreeing with them over Iraq - I don't think I agree with the Americans in principle (well at least no-one has proved I should) but anything which knocks the French must be good - so enjoy   :


"Going to war without France is like going duck hunting without your
accordion."

---Donald Rumsfeld, U.S. Secretary of Defense

Going To War Without France Is Like...
...a Texas barbecue without a croissant...
...Marine Boot Camp without your Liza Minelli records...
...the ninth inning  without your placekicker...
...the Normandy invasion without Yves St. Laurent..
...firing up your computer without a virus...
...holding a bachelor party without the bride...
...World War II.  'nuff said.

French Foreign Minister Dominique de Villepin was applauded at the Security
Council after he spoke out against U.S. war plans Friday. They've taken
their own precautions against al-Qa'ida. To prepare for terrorist attack,
each Frenchman is urged to keep duct tape, a white flag, and a three-day
supply of mistresses around the house.

House Speaker Dennis Hastert is so angry at France for opposing White House
policy on Iraq that he's proposed requiring orange warning labels on every
bottle of imported French wine. Let's guess. The warning label will read,
Just Two Glasses Could Make Dictators with Mustaches Appear Less Threatening
Than They Really Are.
---Argus Hamilton

"Somebody was telling me about the French Army rifle that was being
advertised on eBay the other day -- the description was, 'Never shot.
Dropped once"
---Missouri Republican Rep. Roy Blunt

"The French will only agree to go to war in Iraq after we've proven we've
found truffles there."
---Dennis Miller


Raise your right hand if you like the French....
Raise both hands if you are French.

Q: How many Frenchmen does it take to defend Paris?
A: Nobody knows. They've never tried.


Q: Why are there so many tree-lined boulevards in France?
A: Germans like to march in the shade.


"You know, the French remind me a little bit of an aging actress of the
1940s who was still trying to dine out on her looks but doesn't have the
face for it."
---John McCain, U.S. Senator from Arizona

Q: What does the word "Maginot" mean in English?
A: "Welcome!"

"You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam Hussein? Because he hates
America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret. He is French, people."
--Conan O'Brien


"Some members of Congress are so upset with this thing with France that they
want to impose trade sanctions against French products. They want to ban
French products like Evian. And you thought Hollywood celebrities were
against the war before....!"

"I don't why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out
of Iraq. After all, France
wouldn't help us get the Germans out of France!"

---Jay Leno


Q: What did the mayor of Paris say to the German Army as they entered the
city in WWII?
A: "Table for 100,000  m'sieur?"

"The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came marching into Paris
under a German flag."
--David Letterman